I can see you, hear you, and smell you.  If we agreed, I could touch you and taste you.  I can hear the sounds that you make and understand the sounds that you make that are words.  I can understand the message in your words but I can sense that your words sometimes are brief, are guarded, are stressed and restricted.

Like the words that I speak, I am certain that you may be not articulating all of the aspects of your thoughts.  I feel that there is more to your thoughts than you have shared with me in your words.  I can only guess, but prefer to not guess, what might be in your thoughts that you aren’t sharing.

So why do you share what words that you do?  And what more, how much more, might you share?  What separates your spoken message from the depths of your thoughts?

I analogize with “What’s it like having elbows?”.  Can you describe to me what it’s like having elbows?  I’ve tried to do so myself but without much success… elbows just are.  Having elbows is so much an intimate, intricate, always-there part of me that, amazingly, it’s difficult, nearly impossible for me to even approach describing in a meaningful way what it’s like having elbows—unless I introspect about “what it’s like having elbows”.

And from the few words that you spoke to me about you’re an intimate matter, I have the sense about those words that there is more you could say.  That there’s more of a story than just a single, brief statement.

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Within the existence that we share, we have interaction that relies on our senses for communication.  The sense of hearing is only a part of what makes up our interaction.  The unspoken parts of our dialog, whether we’re giving close attention or not, can add much to our message to others.  Some of the unspoken parts can be intentionally withheld while other parts just don’t have words—can’t be spoken no matter, almost, how much we try.

Just think though, how much more of a descriptive message could be delivered if I were able to articulate more about my thoughts.  Aside from the time it might take to do so, what is between my brief statement and a somewhat more comprehensive, “all out” message to tell someone about an intimate matter?

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When I have more than a few words to share with others, maybe even with only my most intimate friends, about a most intimate matter in my life, I am better able to be more comfortable within our shared existence.

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After navigating the space between the “before and after” of developing a more comprehensive, “all out” message about an intimate matter in my life, it should be easier for me to go even further, even if for only myself, toward understanding and describing the intimate matter.  With each expansion of my description, my comfort level within my existence and within our shared existence, continues to expand.